Getting Away From Negative Talk

One of the most important things for young people is to build a sense of self-worth. In order to build this sense of worth it is imperative that teens have a lot of encouragement and get chances to try things on their own that build confidence in their abilities. One other thing that seems to have a really big impact is way they talk about themselves.

The old adage "If you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all," should really be applied to the way we talk about ourselves as well. I hear a lot of students saying things like "I'm so dumb!" or something similar. Usually this kind of talk reflects what they feel about themselves inside. It helps to hear others say good things about you, but if you consistently contrast that with the negative thoughts you feel about yourself, it is hard to feel a true sense of self-worth.

One thing that I do to combat this is my classroom is by simply not allowing anyone to say anything mean or negative about anyone including themselves. When I hear a student say something like that, I make them repeat after me "I'm (name) and I am smart, kind, and people like me!" or something like that. I usually make them repeat the opposite of the negative thought they have voiced. For instance, if Joey calls himself dumb, he has to repeat after me a saying about how smart, intellegent, and downright genius he is.

The thing about this type of behavior modification is that it needs to be done with a sense of humor because they don't believe it themselves quite yet. But after repeating something positive after you a few times, they stop berating themselves openly. It doesn't mean that they have all positive self-talk in their minds, but it is a great way to start!

Rebekah Engle is a teacher in an alternative high school. She is very involved in her community and writes a local blog called Look What's Happening in Salem.